9 things I've learned (so far) while living alone for the first time

9. Things can get really lonely sometimes. Especially when you're in a city far from home and you don't know too many people. It's important to pick a hobby and be social. I've taken this time alone to paint, run, watch new TV shows and occasionally bar hop by myself and make new friends.

8. Never EVER leave dirty dishes in the sink over night. I left one dirty cup in the sink over the weekend while I was in Miami, and when I got home, I had little critter pets all over the place. It was gross, in deed.

7. Sand is extremely hard to clean up. There's still sand in my tub, carpet and couch, even though I've vacuumed and scrubbed way too many times :(.

6. Ya don't always have to flush. Concerve water.

5. Walking around naked is freakin' fun. Nuff said.

4. However, make sure the blinds are closed. That lawn mower man can get awfulllyyyy close to the window sometimes and I must say I think he's gotten a free show of me dancing nude in my room.

3. Groceries are expensive. I spent over $50 the other day on fruits, cereal, plugins, salad and noodles. Seriously? That's pretty ridiculous considering some of the fruit went bad and I barely eat cereal. Go with the generic brand and don't shop while hungry! Also, make a list and stick to it!!!
 
2. Do take out the trash often, even if it's not full. The smell of crap really sucks.
 

1. Be free. Living alone is so liberating. There's no one to nag about your messy room, no one to intrude on your privacy and no one to judge you for singing Girls Just Wanna Have Fun while painting naked in the living room. Everyone should live alone at one point simply beacause it's liberating and allows for personal growth.

10 things I learned after dating a #$%@#^#^

This is me being my own therapist. :)


10. I learned that it's okay to have my own, separate goals and live them out separately, but together. My priorities have always been the important things: school, family, my career and doing whatever makes me happy. It's fine to do your own thing, just make sure to share your experiences with that person, even if it's just talking about it and not actually experiencing it together.

9. If no one will say it, I will: when he/she is not finding the spot, ya better draw out a map and help a brotha/sista out. No one knows what makes you get the tingles better than yourself. Speak up if your significant other is completely clueless down there --- just don't be mean about it! The relationship is sooo much better when the intimacy is great. No one should ever have to overlook bad sex!!!

8. No, hanging out with your ex is NOT okay. I never had a problem with this up until, well, it became a problem. I'd never want to tell someone I love to stop talking to someone else, and if the right person comes around, I shouldn't have to. Anyone in their right mind should know it's okay to stay on good terms with an ex, but a complete disrespect to bring em around.

7. Your friends are your friends, and my friends are mine. It's fine to have mutual friends, but it's necessary to have your own friends.

6. On that note, friend days are a MUST. It makes you miss your booboo and appreciate your time together. It also allows you to experience "you time" and not so much "us time." Gossip and wine with the girls keep a woman sane!

5. Call me naïve, but it's okay to not snoop. I never did and it made me feel confident and secure about myself. I just thought I had no reason to. CLEARLY I was wrong (!!!) but I wouldn't have it any other way. Jealousy and insecurity are wasted emotions.

3. Never go to sleep angry at each other. Resolve all your issues before bedtime, kiss and makeup!

2. Breakups are not the end of the world. They allow for change and growth. People break up all the time. Seriously, get over it and make the best of it. I did!

1. Forgive and forget. I promise it will set you free. I'm still working on the forgetting part, but the forgiving stage is done and over with and it's a great feeling. :)

I admit it: I still want Jennifer Aniston hair

At the start of the year, I got a much too expensive hair makeover. Though my hair looked awesome for a whole month, the triple digit money I paid for it should have stayed in my piggy bank. Truth is, no one should ever pay that much money for hair. It gets oily in two days, picks up bad smells and grows faster than a Chia Pet. Since then, I've been maintaining my locks on my own, doing my own streaks and yup, even cutting my own hair. -Tough times.-

This morning, I realized how much I suck at doing all of those things. My streaks look, well, like shit, and my hair is uneven. Why, WHY?, can't I just have Jennifer Aniston hair???

Stuart Little

It's kinda bittersweet... you know, this whole "temporary move" thing. In case you DON'T know, I've moved to Stuart, Florida for three months to intern at the Stuart News. I was beyond excited to finally leave the nest, even if it was for just a little while. I was even more excited to work with new people at a newsroom and to get to work with other interns my age. Though my experience at the Palm Beach Post was great, I was the only intern around and at times I kind of just felt, well, lost.

Things are different here.

Wayyy different.

For one, people here are nice. That's not something I'm used to coming from Miami. I mean really, the people here actually slow down and make way for you when you want to switch lanes on the road. They say good morning and good night, even if they don't know you. They smile when you make eye contact. Am I still on the same planet where people sized you up and down if you looked at them? Where people sped up if you wanted to switch into their lane? Where you have to lock your door as soon as you hit a specific part of town because you're scared shitless? Yup, same planet. In fact, only two hours away. It's astonishing.

Anyway, my condo is cute. Two bedrooms/two bathrooms (The other bedroom and bathroom remain untouched. That room freaks me out. I swear, I think it's haunted). I have two, uhh, nice-to-look-at neighbors, if you know what I mean. But the greatest thing of all is that I'm so close to the beach. I go twice a day sometimes. It's awesome. I wish I could surf or fish. Sigh.

What sucks is that I know a handful of people. As the Miami girl that is used to going out every night, I want to pull every single strand of hair out when I see myself sitting on the couch at 8 PM doing absolutely nothing.

Stuart is beautiful. There's beach and there's country. There's nice people, and, well, okay also some not-too-nice people, but I just brush those off.  There's no traffic. There are plenty of things to do, I just have no one to do it with and that, eh, that just SUCKS.

May Madness

Okay, so I haven't come by in a while. I have a pretty legit reason, in my defense.

MAY WAS AN INSANELY BUSY MONTH!!!

On May 7, I celebrated by 22 birthday (my real day is on the 11) and I wanted to make it a big one. It was definitely a success... I had a greaaattttt time. My friends and I all had been anticipating Sex & the City 2, so I decided to make it a girl's night, Sex & the City style. We all had dinner and drinks at Dolores But You Can Call Me Lolita and then danced the night away at Blue Martini.

On May 8, my amazing editor, Chris Delboni, had a party at her house. It was a nice way of ending the semester and my time with the South Florida News Service. She insisted on putting me on the spot by having everyone sing happy birthday to me and thennnnnn making me give a speech. 

That same day, the wonderful and veryyy cute Tim McGraw came to West Palm Beach and put on a helllll of a show. The opening act was Lady Antebellum and, okay fine they weren't as fantastic as I thought they would be, but overall it was a goooood night.

Theeeeennnn, come May 11, I celebrated my real day with the girls at reggae night at Bougenvillias. I love love love the band that plays there every other tuesday. I'm determined to have them play at my wedding (assuming I will get married one day in the distant future) .

The weekend after, I moved into my first place. Though it's only a temporary, 3 month move, I was sooo excited to finally get a taste of what it's like to be alone. I moved to Stuart, Florida to start my internship at the Stuart News, a Scripps Treasure Coast Newspaper.

Expect to see more updates on my experience. ;)

Gum

“Tomatoes,” said Professor Richards when I asked him what I should make a video about for the final project.


It was an out-of-the-box suggestion. He wanted me to record tomatoes and give them a voice, telling the story about how tomatoes had it rough this winter but are slowly recovering.
I wasn’t really sure how to execute this, though. I’m creative and I’ve picked up a video camera once or twice, but tomatoes, really? I don’t even like tomatoes. I always ask for my burgers without them, and once, when I accidently bit into one, I spit it right back out into my salad.


So I went home and slept on it. Once the idea had marinated into my brain, I realized tomatoes just weren’t my thing. I figured I’d just do what everyone else was doing. I’d find someone with an interesting story and interview them.

Weeks went by. I had nothing.

Then one day, just days before my video was due, it hit me. I was sitting at the bus stop, waiting for the FIU shuttle, when I noticed my foot was stuck to the floor. I had stepped on gum. I looked around and noticed there was gum everywhere: on the sidewalk, on the benches and on the payphone. I became inspired.

And so came about the idea for my video. Enjoy:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxoJ752Z3fk

P.S.
Professor Richards,
If that video is unacceptable for its pointlessness, you can always see the Rolls-Royce video I worked on.

Nothing.

Nothingness. It’s hard to grasp that concept. What exactly is nothingness? If you’re thinking of nothing, aren’t you thinking of something (nothing)? Whatever.


Professor Richards has assigned us to go home and do nothing for 15 minutes, then write about it. In my attempt to do so and experience this idea of nothingness, I began to realize just how much I was in need of a chance to stop, breathe and reflect on my week. And a hell of a week it had been.
After looking back on it all, I realized that I had just wasted 5 of my 15 minutes recollecting my thoughts. I reminded myself that the task was to think of nothing, not of everything, and so I started my 15 minutes all over again.

I continued to lie on my comfy queen-sized bed with my dog Max and his slobbery chew toy, intending to take only 15 minutes trying really, really hard to commit to this activity. You’d think that an assignment that requires a student to do nothing would probably be the easiest in his or her college career. Wrong. Definitely wrong. I took a deep breath.
Which reminded me of my first year of college, when I took a psychology class with a nutty professor that surely had a great time in the 60s, if you know what I mean. Every morning, he’d bring out his meditation bells from his backpack and as soon as he’d ring them, we were to close our eyes for five minutes and focus on breathing. I never really got it at first. I’d just close my eyes and occasionally peek to see if everyone else was doing it. One time I accidentally wandered off into a dream and woke up when my classmate moved his chair. Embarrassing. By the end of the semester, I had it down-packed. I began practicing the art of mediation at home, usually before going to sleep. Still do it today.

Anyway, I rested motionlessy, staring at my old-school popcorn ceiling that needed a good dusting ASAP. But what occurred in my mind was far from “nothing” and I felt uneasy doing, well, nothing about it.

The easel to the right of my bed was just sitting there, staring at me, perhaps even screaming at me. I hadn’t picked up a paintbrush in weeks. I had forgotten what the scent of acrylic paint smelled like. And as I stared back, I mentally told myself that I’d not only write the thoughts my mind produced during this assignment, but I’d paint them as well.

I stood, searched my cabinets for paint and brushes, and began mixing colors to make new ones that reflected my mood. I set my iPod to play songs from my "as a kite" playlist (it's the one I put on when I feel artsy.) This was my therapy.

I felt mentally exhausted and overwhelmed. On top of everything, I had kept all my emotions hidden, like I often do as a result of my uncontrollable stubbornness and pride. This was why I had picked up the hobby of painting in the first place. I needed a way to express my feelings without saying them to the world. Today was one of those days. Really, all I wanted to do was let it all out – my frustrations, my anger, my worries, my sadness, and my hope for a better week that starts tomorrow.

I had no plan of what to paint, and most times I don’t. I just play with colors and once I make my first stroke on canvas, I just continue until something comes about. And I never sketch, either, ’cause like it say’s on my wall, ”Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius” – Marilyn Monroe.

My “15 minutes of nothingness” became 45 minutes of pondering, analyzing, and putting it all onto a canvas. And this was what it all came to: